I woke up with a thought, and this title flashed before me. This has been the most interesting journey. Who am I to know what’s in a man’s heart, or have the authority to write on this subject matter? No I don’t. I approach this with care and will only share from my own personal discovery.
First of all, let me clarify this: I was not on the road of “men discovery”, neither was I interested at this juncture of my life and yet. It is a subject I would shy away from. If you’ve read my many postings, you’d probably kind of guess, I am currently not in favour of what I see and have experienced. I hold a very high view of what a man should be after all the disappointments.
However, when God wants to heal you, He heals you whole. Now that is not something you get out of a snap of fingers. Things don’t just go away. We have a misconception of belief that after you become a Christian, that life would certainly be better and that would mean something like a Cinderella transformation. You are whisked to the castle, you have maids and footmen and lived happily ever after and oh yes! that Prince Charming too!
How did I end up writing about this? For the last one year, somehow, if there’s any subject on relationship, it kept popping up in front of me. I would snooze on a sermon I was watching only to wake up to a relationship sermon. I would pick up a book to read for the night only to drop out a book on Love in the stack that was meant for gifting that had stayed on my table. I can go on and on about this. That is like God saying, “I’m gonna be in your face about this subject matter that you keep avoiding”. And that He did.
The journey I am on is self discovery. My purpose here on earth. What did you save my life for. Here I am thinking of big things. The “GO into all the earth and make disciples”. I tried the mission field. I am not good for the mission field – my physical body is hurting all the time. OK let’s do something less physical, and be home based. No, I am not musically inclined. I can’t sing. Let’s pray. Oh I can pray the Heavens come down! But then, that’s not it. God still wants to do something in my life.
Finally I said “Ok God, I’m gonna stop fighting it. Show me what you want me to see. Open my eyes Lord.” A day later, as I was working with my trainee, God did a revelation. And this is what I saw through the eyes of a young man sitting in front of me. Those soulful eyes that need not speak, because God was speaking to me through them. And I saw this vision: Through those eyes, I saw Adam, the first man. He was crouching in the garden naked. He has his arms tightly wound up around the knees, he was crying in anguish. I stopped. My heart felt that I had stopped there, frozen in the moment.
Breathe. I can hear the deafening loud slow thump of my each heartbeat. The heartbeat was thumping so purposeful to each beat that I began to tremble. Feels the same as an anxiety attack. Then suddenly a sense of peace overcame me. And I understood.
After God created Adam, they had a relationship. A good one. They walked together. Checking out all the animals of the sea and the land. Life was simple. Adam bonded with God. He was given the Eden.
“The LORD God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it.” – Genesis 2:15
Then God said it was not good for man to be alone. So God created a helper for him. (Gen 2:18) God took a piece of Adam’s rib to create the helper.
I have seen the soulful eyes of men, young and old.
The ones that have lost something.
In war, they lost their buddies. They bonded and fought together. They held on to each other in mind and soul without words. Then there are those that lost their families in divorces and in death. The family life they built. The little ones that they once held in awe on their birth. The time spent waking up everyday to go to work and take some crap at work just because they needed to build that nest back home. Sometimes men just don’t talk about it. The mother he lost. The father he never knew. The woman they loved that have walked out on them at their lowest season of their lives. Some of those eyes are full of regrets. A broken heart.
They lost even their voices to cry. They are dumbfounded by the loss.
Deep inside of every man, like Adam, crouching in agony. They cannot understand themselves. They are simple: Just work and take care of it. But then, they struggled with it. Both in work and trying to take care of the family. They are supposed to do this with a helper.
But… but, ahem. The women are not much of a helper these days! Where are the maids and the footmen?! And you’re no Prince Charming!
Do you see what I see?
The men is crouching over. He’s no Prince Charming. Sometimes he tries. Work up the ladder, get to be rich. Buy the car, buy the house, buy the handbags. And she’s still not happy. He’s getting a migraine. Rubs his head. Now she demands the bed more than he does. He doesn’t understand. First she says she loves him. She gave him all the go-ahead signals. Now she has remained the same! She’s still wanting more. She wants the maids and the footmen. She doesn’t care for her children. She’s definitely no woman of Proverbs 31! Oh… and she also wants her career, her own security, her own money. We do it all in the name of raising a better family lifestyle, better education for the children, family vacations, hey we need to post “happy family instagrams!”
Some men has started to fear even before it began! So they don’t work. They are uninterested in a career, a commitment or anything for the matter. Let’s just waste the time away because it won’t matter what I do anyways. They go about their lives, passing time with aimless pursuits of materialism and women that they keep to satisfy their flesh or it could be “just business” as my friend would say. Get that “family life” going for all to see, but deep inside, he’s at a loss.
Either they cared or didn’t… they are crouching in the garden of Eden, at a loss.
The next scene I was presented, was that now, the ball is my court.
Do you know who you are supposed to be now, wo-man? He says.
The man said,
“This is now bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called ‘woman,’
for she was taken out of man.” – Genesis 2:23
Then I saw in my vision… a naked woman walked up to Adam, put her arms around him and hugged him, loved him and says, I’m sorry.
“I’m sorry I have caused you so much pain, so much hurt. I am supposed to be there for you. I am supposed to love you, support you and help you. Please forgive me.”
The serpent tricked Eve in the garden of Eden and have continued until today. He has no new agenda. Same agenda, just in new packaging that continued to trick us. All the serpent is trying to do is to remove us women, from helping the man. What has the serpent made you believe?
The man is simple. He cannot understand why the woman just won’t help him and stay by him.
The women are still listening to the serpent. Some has turned crafty, just like her master the serpent.
Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden’?” Genesis 3:1
“Lord, forgive me of my sins. Forgive me from following the voice of the serpent. Release me from the stronghold of the serpent. Set me free. Let me follow after you. I fully submit to You. Help me be obedient to your instructions. Renew my mind with your words, who you created me to be. Let me walk into my destiny, the purpose you created me for. Let me also be a blessing to those around me. In Jesus’ name I pray”
mamajenn ❤
Mama Jenn Living 
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