Sometimes you don’t know why you don’t “wake up”. You take up courses, hobbies, go to work and life seems to be in a tick-tock working order. Oh well, at least you are trying to make it go tick-tock. You’re up and running, doing the pace, get-involved they say, and keep moving. Sometimes you take on so much, there is no time to even think or know how to sit still and enjoy the peace and quiet. Your life has to be – moving, moving, on the go. You make decisions with a quick snap and say to yourself “I’ve got this!!”.
Could we be (again) lying to ourselves? Oh how easily we are ‘deceived’ into believing we’ve got it altogether. We did everything people say it’ll work. If you’ve got the job, they say you don’t have the passion. If you’ve got the money, they say you need health, exercise, stay fit, eat healthy and the next thing you know, you’re launched into ‘that kind’ of lifestyle of fitness and conscious eating. We’re ‘sent’ into a perpectual whirlwind, chasing to accomplish the meaning of ‘holistic’ balanced life.
Even as Christians, having ‘faith’ in God, your life still seems to be ‘unbalanced’. You ask questions like “why me?”, “why did this happen to me”, “is this You, God?” You lay there, postrated before the Almighty and ask God “how more low, do you want me to get?” Your fists no longer have the strength to pound on the floor. Though yes, there was a time when you had so much energy, you ‘fought hard’ with God. You shouted to the sky, you banged the door, even threw the Bible out and you were dismayed with what you ‘believed in’. He, was not the God you believed about. He, did not give you what you asked for. The Christians, ah yes, ‘those’ Christians… they turned a blind eye to your needs. They gossiped behind your backs, they were…. rude! People with other faith had more tolerance than you!
Okay… after all the venting out…. what is there left, you ask.
God, is not the God of your expectation. He ‘dissappoints’ you. That is what you are angry about, isn’t it? You are angry with the people who ‘failed’ you. In actual true fact, is it God that you are angry with? He dissappointed you, didn’t He? He didn’t give you a Boaz, He didn’t give you a Ruth, He didn’t give you a Joseph, He didn’t give you the ‘promised land’. So you go trudging through the fields now, with your head down. “Do you go church?” your friends asked. Your reply is, “sometimes”. “Do you go for any bible study class?” Your reply is, “I don’t do classes. I don’t like reading or sharing.” No, that’s not the truth. You don’t do these things because you’re dissappointed with God. It’s not your faith that is broken. It’s the dissappointments that has broken you.
I have hoped against all hopes. I stayed obedient, just to prove to myself that God is who I believed him to be – a God of promises and restoration. As I continued this journey, I learned that God is not a God of my expectations. He will, restore… but not on your terms. He will, give you His Promises, but not in the way you expect it to be. Very often, the gifts will come in ways that you still need to “work at it”.
When God gave the Isrealites the promised land, they had to conquer it bit by bit (Book of Joshua) He will give you your victories, bit by bit. But you do, have to get up, get in there, and ‘fight’. Only this time, you fight with the weapons He has given you. And know that the victory is yours provided you do it according to His ways and timing. Patience is the key. We no longer need to battle in the physical warfare, but we are battling our Spiritual mindset warfare.
Are you so foolish? Having begun by the Spirit, are you now being perfected by the flesh? Galatians 3:3
God’s work in us, is Transformation. His interest is in, Transformation. Therefore, have we started in faith in Christ only to seek the satisfaction with the things of the flesh? The house you wanted, the business deal, the Boaz – a man to redeem you, your family & financial status, the Ruth – a beautiful and humble woman who chooses to serve another woman of God and counted in in the lineage of Jesus Christ, the Joseph – who has status and privileges as Prime Minister, and finally, the Promised Land – fruitful Kingdom work, and a place of ‘rest’. This, is most where many of us wants to ‘hide’ in. A ministry.
Don’t be ‘imprisoned’ by what you thought God’s redemption look like to you. Trusting God is giving Him full authority of where He is going to lead you. It is not where you wanted to go, very often it is where you don’t want to go. Only then, He can show you the way to win victories in your life. Only then, you will know He is with you. He has the bigger picture. He is, as we believed, God who is able.
He doesn’t want to give you peanuts. He wants you to fully realise your potential, capabilities and the gifts He has placed inside of you. Many of us, has made a pit-stop at Kadesh-Barnea (Numbers) and stayed in the ‘wilderness’. Some of us… ‘crossed’ the Jordan. Continue your journey, only be “strong and courageous” (Josh 1:9) Depend wholly on Him and be led by the Spirit. It’s not where you want to be, but it’s where, He wants you to go. It’s not about you, it’s about His master plan. Stay focused.
Transformation at work
Mamajenn ❤️